According to https://footprintstorecovery.com/blog/alternatives-to-12-step-programs/, “Peer support groups are an important part of long-term addiction recovery. They are free groups where people recovering from addictions get support from others in recovery. Attending these groups can provide a sense of community as well as accountability in refraining from substance use. Research shows peer support groups are most effective when combined with formal addiction treatment.

Until the 1970s, 12-step groups were the only option of its kind for people in recovery, but today there are several alternatives to 12-step programs for those who don’t relate to their focus on a higher power. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) was the first 12-step program, and has been the inspiration for other 12 steps like:

• Narcotics Anonymous (NA) for people with drug addictions.
• Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA) for people struggling with unhealthy relationship patterns.
• Eating Disorders Anonymous (EDA) for people with bulimia, anorexia, and other eating disorders.
• Gambling Anonymous (GA) for people with gambling addictions.
• Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) for poeple with sex addictions.

Twelve-step programs are not for everyone, and Sunshine Behavioral Health gives some good reasons for that — https://sunshinebehavioralhealth.com/alcohol-addiction/alternatives-to-12-step-programs/ .

Recent decades have given rise to a number of alternatives for Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12-step programs. They function in similar ways as the 12 Steps, with local meetings run by members. Some offer both in-person and online meetings.

You’ll notice, particularly with the SOS and LifeRing programs, that there is no dependence on a Higher Power, but rather, these are secular programs. Numerous times, I have heard in meetings that “AA is not a religious program, but a spiritual program.

I beg to differ. According to https://silkworth.net/alcoholics-anonymous/the-spiritual-beginnings-of-a-a/, Bill was a self-proclaimed “conservative atheist,” had never belonged to a church, and never studied the Bible until after he met Dr. Bob in Akron. Dr. Bob told AAs he had nothing to do with writing the Twelve Steps. Nor did he have much to do with the writing of A.A.’s basic text, the “Big Book,” other than to review manuscripts as Bill Wilson passed them to Bob for  approval prior to publication in the Spring of 1939. But Dr. Bob did make some very clear statements about the Bible and A.A. And it was in Akron where A.A.’s basic biblical ideas were honed, tried, and then later put into terse and tangible form at Bill Wilson’s hands.

One may argue that Bill W.’s use of the word “religious” was to be as inclusive as possible and to encompass what is also meant by the word “spiritual” (as suggested in https://www.takethe12.org/bill-w-s-perspective-on-god-the-higher-power/), but nonetheless, adherence to the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous clearly depends on the acceptance of a Higher Power, whom Bill W refers to as “God”. Here are some quotes from “The Big Book”:

• Page 11: “…he made the point-blank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself.”
• Page 12: “My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, “Why don’t you choose your own conception of God?”
• Page 13: “There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would.”
• Page 45: “That means we have written a blook which we believe to be spiritual as well as moral. And it means, of course, that we are going to talk about God. Here difficulty arises with agnostics.”
• Page 51: “When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.”
• Page 53: “…we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn’t. What was our choice to be?”

Here are six alternatives to the 12 Steps.

SMART Recovery

SMART Recovery is a secular alternative to AA and other 12-step groups. Groups like AA encourage members to admit they are powerless over their alcohol addiction and embrace a Higher Power. SMART Recovery views substance abuse as a dysfunctional habit that people can have personal control over. The approach integrates cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and other evidence-based approaches to behavior change. SMART Recovery stands for self-management and recovery training. It is based on their “4-Point Program.”

1. Building and maintaining the motivation to change.
2. Coping with urges to use.
3. Managing thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in an effective way without addictive behaviors.
4. Living a balanced, positive, and healthy life.

According to https://smartrecovery.org/the-change-plan-worksheet , the change plan lights the path to recovery:

“When embarking on the journey of recovery, one of the most empowering steps you can take is creating a personalized Change Plan. This isn’t just a to-do list; it’s a comprehensive strategy that helps you navigate from where you are now to where you want to be. In SMART Recovery, the Change Plan is a fundamental tool that encourages proactive thinking and structured action toward personal growth and healing.”

“Understanding the Change Plan

The Change Plan is a detailed outline that helps you identify, organize, and prioritize various elements of your recovery journey. It includes your motivations for change, the specific changes you want to make, potential obstacles you might face, strategies to overcome these obstacles, and ways to maintain your progress. By putting these details into a tangible plan, you transform your desire for change into a practical guide for action.

Seeking Support
Though your Change Plan is deeply personal, remember that support is available. Sharing your plan with a trusted friend, family member, or your SMART Recovery group can provide accountability, encouragement, and additional insight

Reflecting on Your Motivations
Before diving into what you want to change, it’s crucial to understand why you want to make these changes. Are you seeking better health? Improved relationships? Greater career satisfaction? Inner peace? By identifying and documenting your motivations, you create a wellspring of inspiration that you can draw upon whenever your journey becomes challenging.

Identifying Specific Changes
Here’s where you get specific about what you want to change. These can range from stopping harmful behaviors to developing healthier coping mechanisms, improving emotional well-being, or enhancing physical health. The key is to be clear and specific. Instead of vague goals like “be healthier,” opt for concrete targets like “exercise for 30 minutes at least three times a week.”

Anticipating Challenges
Change isn’t easy, and obstacles are part of the journey. Whether it’s temptation, stress, unsupportive environments, or negative emotions, identifying potential challenges helps you prepare for them. Remember, forewarned is forearmed.

Strategizing Your Path Forward
For every challenge you’ve identified, your Change Plan should include strategies to overcome them. This might involve learning stress-reduction techniques, establishing a support system, removing triggers from your environment, or engaging in alternative activities that provide fulfillment and joy.

Maintaining Progress and Managing Setbacks
Your Change Plan isn’t just for the start of your journey; it’s a living document that accompanies you throughout your recovery. It should include strategies for maintaining your new behaviors long-term and plans for managing setbacks. Remember, a lapse isn’t a failure; it’s an opportunity to learn and adjust your plan.”

Refuge Recovery — https://www.refugerecovery.org/about

Refuge Recovery draws on Buddhist philosophy to help people who are coping with urges and other difficulties in sobriety. Much of the teachings in Refuge Recovery are based on the Buddhist philosophy that the root cause of suffering is people’s desire to push away pain while seeking to fill an unquenchable thirst for pleasure. Participants learn how drinking alcohol and using drugs keeps them stuck in suffering. Through mindfulness and other Buddhist practices they learn to have compassion for themselves and the pain they’ve experienced and acquire healthy ways to cope with difficult feelings and urges.

“Refuge Recovery is a practice, a process, a set of tools, a treatment, and a path to healing addiction and the suffering caused by addiction. The main inspiration and guiding philosophy for the Refuge Recovery program are the teachings of Siddhartha (Sid) Gautama, a man who lived in India twenty-five hundred years ago. Sid was a radical psychologist and a spiritual revolutionary. Through his own efforts and practices he came to understand why human beings experience and cause so much suffering. He referred to the root cause of suffering as “uncontrollable thirst or repetitive craving.” This “thirst” tends to arise in relation to pleasure, but it may also arise as a craving for unpleasant experiences to go away, or as an addiction to people, places, things, or experiences. This is the same thirst of the alcoholic, the same craving as the addict, and the same attachment as the codependent.

Eventually, Sid came to understand and experience a way of living that ended all forms of suffering. He did this through a practice and process that includes meditation, wise actions, and compassion. After freeing himself from the suffering caused by craving, he spent the rest of his life teaching others how to live a life of well-being and freedom, a life free from suffering.

Sid became known as the Buddha, and his teachings became known as Buddhism. The Refuge Recovery program has adapted the core teachings of the Buddha as a treatment of addiction.”

Refuge Recovery offers audio meditations and transcripts of those meditations at https://www.refugerecovery.org/audio-meditations .

From the book Refuge Recovery, quoted in https://addictionsandrecoverydotblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/ce561-process-addiction-a.pdf:

“Addiction is the repetitive process of
habitually satisfying cravings to avoid,
change or control the seemingly unbearable
conditions of the present moment. This process
of craving and indulgence provides short-term
relief but causes long-term harm. It is almost
always a source of suffering for both the addict
and those who care about the addict.”
In short, a process addiction is any behavior
that we engage in to avoid, change or control
the seemingly unbearable conditions of the
present moment.

We satisfy cravings in many ways. Although it
may feel like substance abuse is the prevalent
form of addiction in Refuge Recovery groups,
many of us struggle with other addictions,
including food, sex, technology, gambling,
relationships, spending, codependency, etc.
All are welcome in Refuge Recovery.
Refuge Recovery meetings are meant to be
inclusive of all addictions. Particular meetings
may, at times, seem substance-abuse oriented,
but please, remember: all definitions of
addiction are welcome in our program.

Women for Sobriety — https://womenforsobriety.org/

Women for Sobriety is an organization “of women, for women”. Founded in 1975, Women for Sobriety (WFS) is the first peer-support program tailored specifically for women overcoming substance use disorders (SUDs). With both regional and online meetings, the New Life Program provides supportive, empowering, secular, and life-affirming principles that address the unique needs and challenges of women in recovery. Groups and discussion forums provide mutual support online. Join here! The WFS New Life Program is inclusive of all women, regardless of financial resources, race, religion, abilities, and backgrounds. 

This alternative to AA and NA views drug and alcohol abuse in women as a symptom of common problems experienced in this population. This may include low self-esteem, trauma, depression, shame, guilt, and gender inequality. Alcohol and drug abuse becomes a way to cope with these situations. WFS groups encourage participants to work on the underlying reasons and faulty thinking that feed their drug or alcohol use disorder. Participants learn how to take care of their core needs and become aware and self-fulfilled.

This 12-step alternative focuses on behavior change through:

• Positive reinforcement
• Group involvement
• Taking care of the body
• Cognitive approaches

The following is a description of the program is by Jean Kirkpatrick, its founder:

By Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D. (lightly revised from original publication in 1977)

What is meant by “The Program”? How do we view it? How is it to be used?

The Women for Sobriety New Life Program is comprised of thirteen Acceptance Statements that, when internalized and used, will provide each woman with a new way of life through a new way of thinking.

As women with addictions, we must learn about ourselves and how to avoid the pitfalls of faulty thinking and destructive behavior that used to lead us to taking that first drink or drug, even though we sometimes did not want to.

Since we had a faulty approach to life and living, we must turn our attention to finding new ways of overcoming. This starts with coping first but then moving on to overcoming and a whole change in our approach to each day.

To make the program effective for you, arise each morning fifteen minutes earlier than usual and go over the thirteen Acceptance Statements. Then begin to think about each one by itself. Take one statement and use it consciously all day. At the end of the day, just before sleeping, review the use of it and what affects it had that day for you and your actions. For some, it has proven helpful to use a notebook for recording the sequences of the day and the statement’s effects upon you.

A Program Booklet with short essays on each Statement and our Beginner’s Special are available and can be quite helpful to those new in the program

To make the program effective for you, it must be consciously used each day. Never forget that our faulty thinking is a result of many years. It cannot be corrected overnight. It takes a long time to realize that most of what we thought was cast in a negative view.

The philosophy of the Women for Sobriety New Life Program is that the image precedes our actions. Whatever we think, we eventually act out. If our thoughts are always negative, our actions will also be negative. If our thoughts are positive, so are our actions. One writer once said a garden of weeds cannot produce a beautiful flower. This is also true of our minds. If we have upsetting thoughts, we cannot have a serene life.

We used to think that life was upsetting and our problems followed but it is usually the other way around. Our thoughts were confused and negative, and life’s actions came to be that way also. We create our own world. No one else does. We are responsible for ourselves and our choices. What we are, we made ourselves become.

We have the power of changing our way of thinking. We live in the atmosphere created by our mind and our thoughts.

The program lists 6 levels of recovery ( https://womenforsobriety.org/new-life-program/levels-of-recovery/ )

• Level 1: Acceptance of having a substance use disorder, one that requires the cessation of substance use;
• Level 2: Discarding negative thoughts, putting guilt behind, and practicing new ways of viewing and solving problems;
• Level 3: Creating and practicing a new self-image;
• Level 4: Using new attitudes to enforce new behavior patterns;
• Level 5: Improving relationships as a result of our new feelings about self;
• Level 6: Recognizing life’s priorities: emotional and spiritual growth, self-responsibility.

Secular Organizations for Sobriety (S.O.S.) — https://www.sossobriety.org/

Secular Organizations for Sobriety (SOS) is a 12-step alternative for people struggling with drug addiction, alcohol addiction, or food addiction. It’s based on the writings of its founder James Christopher who got sober in 1985 and decided to inspire a recovery program for non-religious substance abusers. SOS believes people can stay sober based on personal integrity, values, and beliefs. It does not adopt the 12-step concept that turning over your life to a Higher Power is the only road to recovery. The SOS sobriety approach is “sobriety priority.” This means that anyone can stay sober if they make sobriety their number one life priority.

SOS encourages participants to:

• Acknowledge they are an alcoholic or addict.
• Re-affirm and accept this daily.
• Do whatever is needed to make sobriety a priority everyday because drinking or using drugs is not an option.
• Refrain from drinking or using drugs no matter what difficulties arise and accept that life is uncertain but can also be very good.
• Share with confidence as sober people.
• Know that each person is responsible for their life and sobriety.

A description of the program and its General Principles, from https://addictionsandrecoverydotblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/8495b-overviewbrochure1.pdf :

What is SOS?

SOS takes a self-empowerment approach to recovery and maintains that sobriety is a separate issue
from all else. SOS addresses sobriety (abstinence) as
“Priority One, no matter what!”

SOS credits the individual for achieving and maintaining his or her own sobriety. SOS respects recovery in any form, regardless of the path by which it is achieved. It is not opposed to or in competition with any other recovery program.

SOS supports healthy skepticism and encourages
the use of the scientific method to understand
alcoholism.

General Principles of SOS:

• All those who sincerely seek sobriety are welcome
  as members in any SOS Group.
• SOS is not a spin-off of any religious or secular
  group. There is no hidden agenda, as SOS is concerned with achieving and maintaining sobriety
  (abstinence).
• SOS seeks only to promote sobriety amongst those
  who suffer from addictions. As a group, SOS has no
  opinion on outside matters and does not wish to
  become entangled in outside controversy.
• Although sobriety is an individual responsibility,
  life does not have to be faced alone. The support of
  other alcoholics and addicts is a vital adjunct to
  recovery. In SOS, members share experiences,
  insights, information, strength, and encouragement
  in friendly, honest, anonymous, and supportive
  group meetings.
• To avoid unnecessary entanglements, each SOS
  group is self-supporting through contributions from
  its members and refuses outside support.
• Sobriety is the number-one priority in a recovering
  person’s life. As such, he or she must abstain from
  all drugs or alcohol.
• Honest, clear, and direct communication of feelings,
  thoughts, and knowledge aids in recovery and in
  choosing nondestructive, nondelusional, and rational approaches to living sober and rewarding lives.
• As knowledge of addiction might cause a person
  harm or embarrassment in the outside world, SOS
  guards the anonymity of its membership and the
  contents of its discussions from those not within
  the group.
• SOS encourages the scientific study of all aspects
  of alcoholism and addiction. SOS does not limit its
  outlook to one area of knowledge or theory of alcoholism and addiction.

LifeRing Secular Recovery — https://lifering.org/

LifeRing Secular Recovery supports participants in being the leader of their recovery — knowing their triggers and knowing what they need to overcome them. It focuses on strengthening the “sober self” and weakening the “addicted self.” In meetings, members practice drawing on their sober self to connect with other people’s sober self. Participants are encouraged to share practical experiences that help them stay sober. LifeRing is an alternative to AA and NA that believes each individual should find what best supports their sobriety and use it to stay sober. It proposes that the “addicted self” is still there, and will always be there, so people in recovery must work hard everyday to lead with their sober self.

About Lifering — https://lifering.org/lifering-recovery-menu/

LifeRing Secular Recovery is an organization of people who share practical experiences and sobriety support. There are as many ways to live free of illicit or non-medically indicated drugs and alcohol as there are stories of successful sober people. Many LifeRing members attend other kinds of meetings or recovery programs, and we honor those decisions. Some have had negative experiences in attempting to find help elsewhere, but most people soon find that LifeRing’s emphasis on the positive, practical present-day can turn anger and despair into hope and resolve. LifeRing respectfully embraces what works for each individual.

LifeRing believes you DO have the power to overcome your addiction. It’s hard, there are often setbacks, but in every addict there exists the desire to find lasting sobriety. We think of that as the Sober Self. With addiction, that part of us has been beaten down and relegated to a corner of our brains, but it’s still there. We also have an Addict Self that wants to control our decision-making and lead us to use the substance that is wrecking our lives.

LifeRing tries to support your efforts to strengthen the Sober Self and weaken the Addict Self. Our meetings, whether in person or online, consist of addicts using their Sober Self to connect with the Sober Self of other addicts. We share advice, understanding, and encouragement. We focus primarily on our current lives, not on the hurts and damages of the past. Two addicts, talking Sober-Self to Sober-Self, learn from each other, and gain strength from each other.

Steps, and Higher Powers and Sponsors – those work for some people very well. Our approach is different. We think YOU are the best person to design your Own Personal Recovery Program – you know what’s needed in your life and what has to be abandoned. You know what triggers cravings and what provides healthy and strengthening pleasure. You know the path you want to be on and you are the only person who can figure out how best to get there. LifeRing provides safe and supportive contact with others that enables that process to succeed.

LifeRing provides support for you to get and stay addiction free. You do the hard work, and we offer information, advice, understanding, and lots of support through local in-person meetings, online meetings, other online resources, and a variety of publications. Some key points about how the LifeRing recovery process works can be found below.

The “3-S” Philosophy of LifeRing

“3-S” is short-hand for the fundamental principles of LifeRing:  Sobriety, Secularity, and Self-Direction.

Sobriety — LifeRing defines ‘sobriety’ as complete abstinence from alcohol or nonmedically indicated drugs. Sobriety means abstinence from alcohol and other drugs, unless medically indicated and taken as prescribed. This includes medically-assisted treatment, which LifeRing views as a decision you make with your treatment providers. LifeRing believes you succeed when you make sobriety your #1 priority. Living each day free from alcohol and other addictive drugs—living as our “sober self”—is our top goal. Our meetings are open to people looking for positive support. LifeRing Sobriety Policy Statement

Secularity — Secularity means without religion, not anti-religion. LifeRing Recovery welcomes people of all faiths and none. Out of respect for all people, LifeRing conducts meetings in a secular way, which means we do not use prayer or talk about religion. Our common shared belief is our dedication to personal effort and the sober self through scientifically based recovery methods. We support each other  by taking responsibility for our own recovery and learning the skills necessary to live a long-term sober life. All meetings, publications and peer support activities focus on personal recovery.

Self-Direction —  Self-Direction in LifeRing means that the key to recovery is the individual’s own motivation and effort. Empowering your sober self means taking action and maintaining a perspective that supports living drug and alcohol free. Joining meetings and using various tools at your disposal brings recovery within your reach. Your recovery is based on self empowerment, your motivation and your efforts. You decide what works for you and build your sobriety upon that foundation. This is your journey. We’re here for support.

Moderation Management — https://moderation.org/getting-started-moderation-management/

Moderation Management suggests that it is, in fact, possible to moderate drinking after experiencing drinking problems. Moderate drinking means keeping drinking quantities under specific limits. Quantities are expressed in terms of customary standard-sized drinks.

The standard drink here is one twelve-ounce bottle of regular (5% alcohol) beer, 5 ounces of table wine (12%), or 1.5 ounces of 80-proof liquor (40%).

Moderation Management then describes guidelines and limits:

• For Men: No more than 14 drinks per week, and not more than 4 per occasion;
• For Women: No more than 9 drinks per week, and not more than 3 per occasion;
• For Both Men & Women: Do not drink on more than 3-4 days per week.

The early abstinence period in MM is simply called “The 30” by many in the program. It can be hard to get started, but there are a number of big benefits:

• You may well feel demoralized by your lack of control over drinking, and feel powerless relative to your drinking habit. When you stop drinking, suddenly you feel, and you are, back in charge.
• You get a space unclouded by alcohol to further develop your resolve for a new lifestyle, to work out your own drinking ground-rules and control strategies, and to get them firmly in mind.
• You’ll enjoy the positive experiences of life without alcohol, which will help give drinking a smaller role in your mind.
• You’ll learn how to say “no” to alcohol. That’s important because as a moderator you won’t drink on many days, and you’ll refuse drinks on occasions when you’ve reached your limit.
• You’ll see while cold sober how people really act while over-drinking. You’ll take away some mental snapshots of behaviors you’d especially like to avoid.
• · While drinking heavily, your tolerance for alcohol increases, so you need more for the same effect. Abstinence restores your sensitivity to alcohol, so that less is enough.

The following is directly quoted from https://moderation.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Guide-to-Moderation-Management-Steps-of-Change.pdf

Your Very Own “30”

The early abstinence period in MM is simply called “The 30” by many in the program. It can be hard to get started, but there are a number of big benefits:

• You may well feel demoralized by your lack of control over drinking, and feel powerless relative to your drinking habit. When you stop drinking, suddenly you feel, and you are, back in charge.
• · You get a space unclouded by alcohol to further develop your resolve for a new lifestyle, to work out your own drinking ground-rules and control strategies, and to get them firmly in mind.
• You’ll enjoy the positive experiences of life without alcohol, which will help give drinking a smaller role in your mind.
• You’ll learn how to say “no” to alcohol. That’s important because as a moderator you won’t drink on many days, and you’ll refuse drinks on occasions when you’ve reached your limit.
• You’ll see while cold sober how people really act while over-drinking. You’ll take away some mental snapshots of behaviors you’d especially like to avoid.
• While drinking heavily, your tolerance for alcohol increases, so you need more for the same effect. Abstinence restores your sensitivity to alcohol, so that less is enough.

Many people who bring over-drinking under control on their own just taper down their drinking over time. But as you can see, there are very powerful advantages for an
abstinence period of 30 days or more. If you feel quite unready to start an abstinence period right now, don’t force it. Keep
mulling the idea over in your mind, and most likely at some point you will feel ready. Or you can start with shorter periods of non-drinking, and then go for a full month.

Learning Skills for Non-Drinking During Your “30”

As well as planning ahead for how you will manage drinking after the “30”, it’s a time to learn skills for the many occasions in the future when you will choose not to drink.
You may feel uneasy about drawing attention to yourself when you refuse a drink. It’s best to have a few phrases ready in mind, such as: “No thanks, I’m on a diet,” or “No thanks, I’ve got an early one tomorrow,” or “No thanks, I’m the driver tonight,” or just “No thanks, not tonight.” You’ll be pleasantly surprised how little most people are concerned. Those who do make it an issue often turn out to have drinking issues of their own. So you’ll have learned that those particular people won’t fit easily with your new lifestyle.

A major skill area for non-drinking is dealing with urges to drink. Techniques here include “avoidance”, “confrontation” and “distraction. ”

“Avoidance” involves keeping away from things that give you drinking urges. Instead of having alcohol ready at hand in the house, you might want to keep it out of the house at
this time, or put away or locked up in some inconvenient place. Don’t spend time with heavy-drinking friends, or go to places like bars where you customarily drink. Keep busy and avoid activities during which you customarily drink, like watching sports on TV. Try to minimize stress, especially stressful situations that typically trigger heavy drinking for you. (More about triggers later). And if you’re tired, thirsty, hungry, or lonely, have some rest or sustenance, or get some positive human contact as soon as possible, to head off a drinking urge.

“Confrontation” involves recognizing that you’ve got a drinking urge, and focusing your attention on dealing with it. The urge often seems to be saying that it won’t leave you alone until you give in. The fact is, the urge will go away if you just outwait it – so mentally settle down to outwait that urge. During the waiting, you can “urge surf.” That is, urges typically rise and fall like waves, and you can make a game of seeing the urge rise, crest, and then inevitably subside.

Another confrontation technique is to substitute positive for negative messages. The urge might say, for instance, that tonight is a special occasion and you can just have a drink or
two and then go back to your “30.” Answer the urge back with the statement: “ Each time I refuse an urge I get stronger and stronger in dealing with it.” Lastly, you can bring to mind
your long-term objective of getting your over-drinking under control, to enjoy a healthier and more satisfying life.

“Distraction” involves having a set of activities you can get into quickly that will draw your attention away from the urge. You might, for instance, telephone a friend, go for a drive, do some housework, or any other positive activity.

Skills for Moderate Drinking

A great use for your time during your “30” is to study various techniques to help keep your drinking moderate when you do resume drinking. The list of helpful techniques is so long
that you probably can’t keep them all in mind. So look for a few that seem to deal best with your particular drinking issues. Get them well in mind for the time later when you’ll start to drink again. As discussed later, you’ll also make up a list of your personal “rules” for managing drinking, and some of these techniques may go on your “rules” list.

Control skills for drinking situations include:

• Measuring, since drinking guidelines are in numbers of standard-sized drinks.
• Counting, to keep to your guidelines.
• Eating helps slow the uptake of alcohol, and is an alternative pleasure.
• The first few minutes seem to set our style for a given drinking occasion.
• Control thirst by having a non-alcoholic drink before or in a drinking occasion.
• Delaying your first drink a bit, and/or getting to the occasion a little late.
• Diluting alcohol by having lower alcohol-content drinks.
• Sipping small amounts slowly to keep the pace of intake down.
• Put the glass down to avoid the automatic drinking that goes with holding a glass.
• Time beforehand the start of any drinks you’ll have on a drinking occasion.
• Self-Talk during drinking about your limits, how well you are managing, etc.
• Bring your own non-alcoholic drinks to a party during an abs period.
• Focus on the fun of the occasion, not the drinking.
• Think about tomorrow anytime you’re tempted to have more than planned.
• Heed the “stop” signal, that feeling that you’ve “had enough.”
• During your “30” you can rehearse the use of these control skills by thinking ahead to a typical drinking situation you might be in later. Then make up a list of the specific skills you will use in such a situation.

P.S.: A classic from Albert Collins —